My brother texted me this week:
"Mom has, IMO….."
Naturally, I did what any responsible sixty-something woman would do.
I panicked.
And then looked it up….
According to Dr. Google, IMO can stand for Intestinal Methanogen Overgrowth—a digestive condition involving excessive methane-producing bacteria in your gut.
I thought...
"Well... that explains a lot."
If you've ever met my mother, you know she has never believed in wasting anything...
Especially gas.
Let's just say she doesn't pass it...
She lets it age.
Like a fine wine.
Then quietly crop dust an entire room...
...and somehow leave you holding the fart.
So honestly?
A gut issue didn't seem completely out of the question.
A little while later, I mentioned the whole IMO situation to my daughter.
She just stared at me for a second.
Then she said...
"Mom... It means In My Opinion."
Wait...What?
My brother wasn't diagnosing our mom.
He was simply giving me... his opinion.
And that's when it hit me.
I have officially become my mother.
And here’s why….
Years ago, when texting first became popular, Mom thought LOL meant "Lots of Love."
She added it to every text she sent.
We didn't realize the problem until I texted her that my dog had died.
Her reply?
"I'm so sorry. LOL."
That's the day we discovered she wasn't heartless...
She just didn't speak "text."
Now I'm over here diagnosing intestinal disorders because I don't know what IMO means.
Life has a funny way of paying you back.
Apparently... age isn't measured in wrinkles.
It's measured in acronyms you have to look up.
LOL
See you next week for another page from The Dolly Mama Diaries... because apparently life keeps giving me material.
