Facing Your Fears: Do It Scared Anyway

There are plenty of scary things at Halloween. Monsters. Ghosts. Goblins.

But some of the scariest things don’t wear costumes. They look like starting over, trying something new, or putting yourself out there when you have no idea how it’s going to turn out.

That’s when the monster in my head comes out.

Mine has a green face and a couple of screws loose. He’s always hanging around, telling me all the things that could go wrong.

“What if you can’t do it?”

“What if you make a mistake?”

“What if everyone finds out you have no idea what you’re doing?”

If they gave out Olympic medals for talking yourself out of something, I would win every time. My monster would be right there on the podium with me, telling me I didn’t deserve it.

But we’re learning to play nice together. I let him talk, and then I do it anyway.

I’ve tried big, scary things my whole life. Not bungee-jumping scary. To me, that’s just stupid. Our heads aren’t attached as well as you think.

I’m talking about starting-over scary. The kind where you really don’t know what’s going to happen.

My latest big, scary thing? Opening DollyMamasByJoey.com.

This time, I decided to try a new approach: not overthink it. Just do it.

Could I build a website? No.

Did I know anything about e-commerce? No.

Was my monster having a field day? Ahhh, yeah.

I can personally tell you there was a lot of crying and talking to a plant in the corner of my studio. But I did it.

I took it one step at a time. Sometimes I knew what I was doing. Sometimes I didn’t. But I kept going.

When you look at everything you don’t know, it can feel like standing at the edge of a very high bridge. And we’ve already discussed how I feel about jumping off one of those.

So I stopped looking at the whole picture and started with what was right in front of me. Then I figured out the next thing. And the next. Baby steps.

Was it scary? Yes. Did I question what I was doing? Of course. I’m me. And my monster was more than happy to help.

But every time I figured something out, the next challenge felt a little less scary. Not easy, necessarily. Just a little less likely to send me looking for the big box of wine I keep hidden for emergencies.

I think we sometimes wait until we feel ready to try something new. But what if ready doesn’t show up? What if it’s at home on the couch, eating the Halloween candy it bought for the trick-or-treaters?

You don’t have to know exactly how everything is going to turn out. You just have to be willing to take the first step.

So if there’s something you’ve been thinking about trying, go ahead. It’s okay to feel scared. Just remember, you don’t have to let the monster in your head make your decisions.

Give him a feather boa and put him in charge of moral support. He’s been in your head long enough to know what you need.

And if he still won’t cooperate… there’s always Plan B. Just ask the Dolly Mama holding his head. 🎃

❤️ joey